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Introduction
Hones in on what is most important.
Depending on the day, hour or even minute, what is most important to the client will change. Such is the nature of individuals in a high-growth phase of their lives. The Certified Coach is both quick to recognize this moving target and is flexible enough to adjust the coaching to be effective in this new terrain.
The Purpose of This Learning Guide
1. To explain the Proficiency.
2. To show how mastering this Proficiency makes you a better coach.
3. To provide key resources to assist you in mastering this Proficiency.
4. Demonstrate the distinction between recent priority vs. recent moment.
What the instructor covers in this TeleClass
1. Sorting out the client's priorities.
2. What is meant by "honing".
3. Coaching demonstrations.
What are the general truths of honing in on what's most important?
1. Priorities can change by the minute.
2. Most of us haven't identified how we prioritize.
3. Part of what we do is help clients find something that is more compelling to do.
How do you hone in on what's most important?
 Notice what is occurring.
Where are the synchronicities? The dissonance? The resistance?
Know what is important.
What are the measures of success? What are the outcomes the client wants? What is in integrity for them?
Discover what is pressing.
Identify the true consequences. Discover opportunities. Examine timing.
What can the client expect?
To shift from chasing, dealing with constant changes, and relying on hope, to being clear, oriented and focused.
What does it mean to hone in on what's important?
1. Distinguish between recent priorities vs. recent moment.
Client will switch goals - usually within a session or two, and sometimes repeatedly. The coach's job is to help distinguish between shifting priorities and what's important in the present moment. Sometimes what appears urgent isn't necessarily important, and sometimes they are both.
2. Sniffing it out.
Honing isn't instantaneous, though it can be fast. Your job is to sniff it out. Like a dog following a scent, you may be all over the place at first, but as you get closer it becomes more of a direct line.
3. Listening for what's NOT said.
What's NOT said is just as important as what is said. Listen for the unspoken comment, fear, desire.
4. Using the client's point of view.
'Nuf said.
What are the steps for honing in on what's important?
1. Ask questions.
Be curious, ask questions. Let the client talk a bit before you respond. They'll lead you right to it without even realizing it themselves.
2. Listen for resonance.
Be curious, ask questions. Let the client talk a bit before you respond. They'll lead you right to it without even realizing it themselves.
2. Listen for resonance.
Listen for what the client is saying to resonate in their voice. You'll hear it. Also listen or feel for when what they are saying resonates within you. You'll get an inkling about what's important.
3. Listen for clients who change goals frequently.
Are you hearing them correctly? Or are they avoiding growing or being in action? Changing goals isn't bad, but it is something to acknowledge and use to hone in on what's important.
3. Identify the need the client is trying to meet.
What need are they trying to meet? This is what's going on behind shifting goals and focus. Obviously you want to hone in on what's going on and how they can actually meet that need. Consider using the needs/wants/integrity model.
4. Define success.
If the client doesn't know how they define success, they'll never know when they get there - hence confusion around what is important.
5. Ask the "Why" question.
Master coaching proficiency #6 - Navigates via curiosity. Most clients don't know what's really important to them. Ask "Why" to get to what is compelling. Asking "why" clarifies. It will not put the client on the offensive unless you ask it in an offensive way.
How can you hone in on what's important?
What questions can you ask to hone in on what's important?
1. What's important to you about that?
2. Why do you want...?
3. What need is not being met by...?
4. What do you want to do instead?
How do you know you've honed in on what's most important?
1. The client is instantly reoriented on "it".
2. The next step is clear and obvious.
3. There is less doubt, delay, and procrastination.
4. The client is naturally moving forward.
Why is this a Proficiency?
1. Requires ability to hear what is not said.
This is an advanced coaching skill because it is subtle and requires the ability to hear and trust your inklings and intuition.
2. Requires application of all 5 elements of the CoachVille Coaching System.
Getting to what is important requires the finesse gained from effortlessly using the 5-Element CoachVille Coaching System.
3. You must be 100% client-focused.
There just isn't room for self-referencing.
4. Blending proficiencies and skills.
Honing in on what's most important requires that you blend your skills and proficiencies at a level beyond goal setting or "results" coaching.
5. Must recognize nuances.
Not only must the Certified Coach be able to recognize nuances, they must be able to articulate them effectively.
How does honing in on what's most important make you a better coach?
1. Accelerates the client.
The client gets in to effective action faster when they are clear about what is important. They are less distracted by daily "urgencies".
2. Shifts become successes.
By making meaningful shifts and taking actions, the client experiences success according to their own definitions. This builds the client's self-esteem, self-confidence, and ability to take on new challenges.
3. Keeps you and the client on track.
You and the client will focus attention on what really matters.
4. Reduces the "firehouse" problem.
Instead of attempting to hit all the problems at once with a big firehouse, or hitting the little problems with more energy than you need, you can finely tune your approach.
5. It gives you a common reference point during coaching.
You and the client can both refer back to what is most important in this and later coaching sessions. It helps you coach better, and helps them get what they want.
What are some questions you can ask to hone in on what's most important?
1. What's important to you about that?
2. Why do you want...?
3. What need is not being met by...?
How do you know if you're getting it?
1. You enjoy the discovery process, and the client begins to, too.
2. The client feels lighter and more clear at the end of the session.
3. The distinction between what is important vs. urgent is clear.
4. You are focused on the deeper shift that is called for, not just the immediate solution.
What are some common mistakes when using this Proficiency?
1. Trying to be instantaneous rather than removing the layers.
It may be tempting to go for the quick fix - but this is probably the pattern that's been happening all along. Pull back the layers and see what's underneath.
2. Being distracted by what is interesting rather than most important.
Drama can be enticing, but not necessarily helpful in creating change. Notice where the story is going.
3. Not designing environments to maintain what's important.
If it's important, there are probably environmental supports or systems that can help maintain it. What needs to happen in the environment to help the client maintain focus on what's important until it can get to the maintenance-free phase?
4. Not being courageous.
You may have to press, or go into territory that is scary for the client. If it's scary, then it's important in some way. Be gentle, not voyeuristic. And remember that they are paying you to help them figure it out, even if they are afraid to discover it. Your courage can help them tap into their own.
What are 12 keys to setting great goals?
Class Notes
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