Can I change without Transformation?

Can I change without Transformation? by Martha Pasternack

The IAC Coaching Mastery® #7 is about helping the client set and keep clear intentions. This mastery makes a distinction between transformation and change.

Have you noticed these days that there is a lot of talk about transformation being the brass ring on the personal growth fast track? Have you noticed an up-tick in what I call “make-over madness,” meaning change is the answer to being stuck in a rut? More and more, my clients have turned to me with a yearning to understand how they can achieve personal “transformation,” and they are fairly certain that all they need to figure out is where to make a change.  When I explore what that looks like for them, they say, “I don’t have a clue.” That intrigues me.

Do you ever wonder why transformation remains an elusive and vague experience? Even when you do all the right things, say all the right words, and take all the correct action steps, the satisfaction that comes with change escapes us.  When you commit to making resolutions for your new year, set your goals, and learn how to measure them, you may still feel disconnected. 

In an attempt to shake things up you may decide to change your hairstyle and hair color (make-over madness), renew your thoughts and assure they are positive, follow the guru’s advice to the letter, write that sage advice down and post it all over your car, office, and home.  Many of my clients are making changes such as these with focused devotion, yet, remain frustrated, confused and yes, even angry at times.

Is transformation all about needing us to change? I think not.

What it requires, instead, is self-acceptance. In fact, self-acceptance is the key to the transformation that opens us to change. Self-acceptance radiates outward from self-love. Transformation achieved via self-acceptance can occur even if you choose not to change a hair on your head. Nothing. Nada. Zip. Zero. It is a practice, not an event.

The pathway to self-acceptance is part of my practice as a Circle of Life Coach. I call this Gentle Medicine ©, and it is a way that helps you to open your mind and heart to the very essence of who you are.

The practice of Gentle Medicine© creates a powerful place within you. From here you can stay still, or take your next step towards personal transformation. From that centered place, change may or may not occur. Transformation is now a choice you make from peaceful and personal power, insight, wisdom, and, let’s face it, pure and simple courage.

Sometimes not doing anything differently and accepting yourself exactly where you are at the moment is the most potent change you can make.

Martha Pasternack