IAC VOICE, Volume 4, Issue 86, August 2013, Circulation 4,386

From the

Picture of a sunsetLike
most years, it seems like summer is flying by. It has been a busy
season for me, spending time with friends and family, preparing to
relocate for graduate school and, of course, enjoying these warm summer
nights! The IAC has been equally busy, hosting all exciting events
around the world. We’ve included some pictures and updates about
some of these events in this month’s issue – be sure to
check them out below.

Some of you may have missed the webinar, IAC Masteries with Natalie Tucker
Miller, hosted by Krishna Kumar. Have no fear! It is accessible in the “Webinars
and Slideshows” section of the IAC website, found here,
along with other recorded presentations.

We’ve got great content this month for you to peruse, covering everything
from the value of an IAC certification, sharing coaching with younger generations,
the importance of authenticity and trust, etc. Happy reading!

Please feel free to contact us at voice@certifiedcoach.org
with comments, questions, event notices, or article contributions. We love hearing
from you!

Beth Ann

Beth Ann Miller


Ann Miller holds a B.A. in Creative Writing and is a native New Englander.
She has a professional background in editing and higher education,
as well as working with youths in the arts. Her stories have appeared
in small online and print journals and she is perpetually at work
on new creative projects.




the President
– Susan Meyer

Susan reminds us how important it is to care for ourselves and describes
a successful support network of Cheerleaders, Comforters, Clarifiers
and Confronters.

the Masteries: A Journey in IAC Certification
– Terri Hase

Reflections on the IAC certification process – and how it changed
this coach’s life.

Ask the Certifiers: Clarify
Natalie Tucker Miller

What to do when a coach “misses or ignores what is most important”?

Establishing and Maintaining a Relationship
of Trust
– Martha Pasternack

It is easy to struggle with authenticity and trust. Martha shares
what a positive influence they have been on both her personal and
professional life.

How Coaching Dream Enablers Empower
Student Coaching
– Leanne Chan

Leanne revisits a meeting that discussed the importance of introducing
coaching to younger generations.

The International Leadership & Coaching

Check out photos from the IAC co-sponsored event: the International
Leadership & Coaching Conference 2013 that was held in Bangalore,
India in June 2013.

Member Chat Calls
Dates and links to the August Member Chats, hosted by Vicki Zanini.

New Masteries Practitioners

the President

by Susan R. Meyer,


Who’s Taking Care of the Coach?

This morning the temperature has dropped to a cool 75° Fahrenheit and the
humidity has dropped to a pleasant level. I’m planning to spend part of
the early afternoon in Central Park, perhaps reading, perhaps listening to music.
It’s been a busy few weeks, paired with very intense weather — temperatures
soaring to triple digits alternating with flooding rain and thunderstorms. After
spending so much time indoors, I am taking care of myself by enjoying the temperate

How are you taking care of yourself? As coaches, we are in a profession that
is most often exhilarating yet also demanding and draining. How many times,
after a very full day of appointments, do you want to both dance in the sheer
joy of your clients’ gains and collapse in a little heap from exhaustion?
How many days do you crowd in just one more thing?

This month, I’m suggesting that you turn to Mastery #9: Helping the client
create and use supportive systems and structures to support yourself. What supportive
structures have you built into your own life?

Time for Yourself

Beyond the basics like good nutrition, exercise, and health maintenance routines,
self-care involves making time for yourself. Years ago, my coach taught me to
build personal time into my schedule. Are you doing this? I take one workday
a week off and put it on my calendar. On that day, I put my coaching and consulting
work aside and get out into the world. Because I’m sometimes so immersed
in our practice that I forget about socializing, I try to schedule time with
family or friends on those days. I’ve also started using a different color
on my calendar to denote personal appointments. It may sound silly, but sometimes
it’s just nice to look at the month and see how much time I’ve reserved
for myself.

Something for Your Spirit

Whatever you may call it – spirit, soul, heart – find a few minutes
every day for some kind of peaceful reflection. Read something that moves you,
find a little time to sit quietly and enjoy your surroundings, pray, meditate.
There’s something that works for everyone. This time devoted to your inner
self is another way of continuing to grow and remain centered.

Maintain Your Support Network

For the past fifteen or twenty years, I’ve been using a four-quadrant
framework with my clients and in my own life. It’s changed over time,
and I no longer even remember the source of the original version. The four components
of this support system are: Cheerleader, Comforter, Clarifier and Confronter.


Everyone should have a Cheerleader. A cheerleader offers unconditional support
all the time. Cheerleaders will tell you how great you are even if all you did
was get out of bed in the morning. Cheerleaders are relentlessly enthusiastic
about even your smallest accomplishment. They urge you to do whatever you want
to do; not by pushing, but by applauding every effort and reminding you just
how wonderful you are.


Your Comforter is the second source of non-judgmental, unconditional support.
A comforter is the first person you call when things aren’t going well.
Comforters give you all the sympathy you need — and nothing but sympathy. They
make a pot of tea or open a bottle of wine or find some chocolate and sit down
to listen and listen and listen. They offer you words of comfort. They are willing
to hear the same story hundreds of times if that’s what it takes. A comforter
will not try to fix things or offer advice. They just offer you all the unconditional
support you need whenever you need it.

One thing that I’ve observed over the years is that, while almost everyone
understands the need for Comforters, there is often resistance to the notion
of having Cheerleaders. Many of us think that we ought to be able to give ourselves
positive reinforcement — and to a certain extent, that’s true. But a
little external reinforcement couldn’t hurt. I have a colleague who every
so often starts off a text message with “hi, gorgeous.” I walk a
little taller and my smile is a little bigger the rest of the day. Of course,
there’s more to support than unconditional positive regard. The remaining
two roles are people who help you buckle down and accomplish great things.


A Clarifier is an expert at sorting things out. Clarifiers help you get at
what is going on beneath the surface. They probe to find the real problem and
help you get a clear idea of what you want to do about it. You can bring any
situation to clarifiers and they will ask you questions, listen, ask more questions,
pose hypothetical situations, help develop solutions, and, finally, help you
pick the solution that will work best for you. When you can’t figure out
what went wrong (or right) or what to do next, sit down with a clarifier and
work through the situation.


Despite the name, this is a supportive role. I’ve stayed with this name
to balance out the four C’s, but you may want to substitute another, gentler
word for Confronter. A Confronter will not let you get away with a thing. Confronters
remind you of your commitments and push and push until you meet them. If you
mention a goal to them, they will ask for a progress report every time you see
them. You may not always appreciate your confronters, but they are essential
for all of us who have a tendency to procrastinate. They don’t accept
excuses and they don’t give up until you finish what you started.

At the last Conversation Among Masters, Maria Nemeth gave a wonderful example
of the role of good confronters. When she was writing The Energy of Money,
she had three friends who fulfilled this role. She asked for their support in
making sure she wrote three pages a day. Every morning, one of them would call
Maria and ask three questions: Are you sitting at your computer? Is it turned
on? How many pages are you going to write today? If Maria said “three,”
the conversation was over. But some mornings, she, like all of us, had a whole
litany of excuses. The friend would listen patiently and without judgment and,
when Maria wound down, would ask, “Maria, how many pages are you going
to write today?” I’ve adopted that technique myself to keep me on
track with my book.

Make a grid. Put at least one name in each quadrant. Make a second grid. Fill
this one in with the names of people you support. That’s your support
network. I revisit mine every six months to be sure it’s current.

Find a Coach

I’m a firm believer in the notion that every coach needs a coach and
I often have more than one. My coaches serve as sounding boards. They support
me in achieving my own goals and in supporting my clients in meeting their goals.
They offer marketing advice. They share their new ideas and listen to mine.
Some are paid coaches; some are buddy coaches. Each relationship enriches my
life and I know I enrich their lives as well.


This quote from George Bernard Shaw is the tag line in my coach’s email
signature: "…we don't stop playing because we get old. We get old because
we stop playing."


I’m seeing more and more studies suggesting that lifelong learning is
even more important than diet and exercise in longevity. Interesting! Have you
completed your Learning Agreement? Read this
in the July VOICE.

We’ve got a wonderful collection of interviews with masterful coaches
for you to listen to. The latest
, conducted by Kristi Arndt, is with Julia Stewart, lifetime member
and Director of the School of Coaching Mastery. There’s also a new teleseminar
on the Masteries
, presented by Natalie Tucker Miller and facilitated by
Krishna Kumar. Finally, the slides from last year’s and this year’s
presentations are available

Well, this has been a long message. I hope it helps support you on your path
to coaching mastery.


Dr. Susan R. Meyer 
Dr. Susan R. Meyer, MMC is President of Susan R. Meyer, Coaching and
Consulting. As a Life Architect, she helps wise and wild women construct
a joyful life, provides executive coaching and instills a coaching
approach to leadership for organizational success. www.susanrmeyer.com.



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Feeling the Masteries: A Journey in IAC Certification
Terri Hase

In 2001 I discovered coaching and the discovery shot a lightning bolt right
into my soul. Naively, I always believed that people went to work for a company,
gradually moved into Human Resources, and then on into Training and Development.
Thus were the limits of my thinking about how a person got into a position of
'teaching' others about performance. It was limited to 'work' and it was achieved
through an inevitable series of internal promotions. Like I said, I was naive.

When I learned that there was a budding industry (circa 2001) where people
who were called to impact the lives of others could flourish as entrepreneurs,
well, I felt like I found my home.

I think that this is a similar story for many coaches. By and large, when people
discover coaching, it's accompanied with an overwhelming feeling of discovering
'home.' People are called to coaching, pulled to coaching by their heart strings,
often with their head kicking and screaming. Time and time again I've mentored
and worked with coaches who say that they came to coaching because they just
couldn't not follow their heart to it. Furthermore, following their
heart was often challenged by their spouses, and well-meaning friends. Yet,
they came anyway!

It stands to reason that the vast majority of coaches (new and veteran alike)
are in the industry because the idea of coaching impacts them emotionally, personally
and profoundly. They feel they are answering their call by pursuing coaching,
and that speaks volumes about the breadth and depth of the emotional investment
on the line. (Most of you are here with your hearts on your sleeves, trying
to fulfill YOUR dream and purpose, of helping fulfill the dreams and purposes
of others. YOU are in a very vulnerable place!)

What I discovered is that my IAC certification impacted me the very same way
my journey into coaching did. That is, I had to get vulnerable to earn it, had
to grow to understand it, and I had to make fulfilling my dream an active priority
to get there.

When I was new in the industry I was lured by the idea that I'd better ‘hurry
up’ and get certified to have any credibility. I chased that sense of
completion and validation for about a year. Then I realized that I was off the
mark: the credibility I was after wasn't coming from study or academic activity.
In fact, I kept feeling like I must need more training, because I wasn't growing
as rapidly in confidence as I thought I should be for my hundreds of hours of
research and review. That was all about to change.

I partnered with a group of other new coaches and together we set our intention
to pass the IAC exam. We thought that this would surely show we had our stuff
together, right? It would surely give us the credibility we were craving. We
studied together, aggressively, for several weeks. We challenged each other
to offer demonstrations and defend the core ideas, as if we had engaged in a
debate scenario to defend the principles against an opponent or naysayer.

Well, as you can imagine, something amazing happened. Five out of five of us
passed the exam, and four of us passed at least one of the two live demonstrations,
with three actually receiving passing scores on both sessions and earning our
IAC-CC. I was one of them.

It was an amazing journey, an amazing outcome and an inspiring accomplishment.
I hadn't mastered a body of work; I'd become a better version of myself. My
learning wasn't hooked into the accomplishment of navigating rules and processes,
or leaping through hoops. My learning was hooked into living, advocating, expressing
and applying the Masteries to my own life. The study wasn't 'the thing': it
was the living and being that was important. When I was done, I discovered how
much I'd changed. I could feel it.

The key factor in my ability to demonstrate effectively in the certification
exam was my ability to feel my way through the sessions, not think
my way through them. I trusted myself and I believed that I truly understood
the Masteries. I felt I knew them intimately. It was this intimacy that gave
me the confidence I was looking for, not the actual certification, not the letters
at the end of my name. It was way bigger. I had learned the meaning of the Masteries
in my own life, as they related to me and my results. I grew into them, and
they fit me perfectly. I can only compare it to the feeling when you put on
a perfectly tailored outfit and see yourself in the mirror. You think, "Oh,
there I am. That's the me I've been looking for." Having that feeling,
knowing the Masteries were just a part of me, that was when I truly became a

It's why I can say with confidence that the IAC Certification is the most meaningful
certification I've ever earned, and I bet the same will be true for you too.
Because it's not just a destination, it's a life-changing journey.

Terri Hase


Terri Hase is a quirky, light-hearted, iron-fist in a velvet glove.
Strong coaching skills combine with a deep love of people, and produce
results. Mom, wife, dog-mom, coach, entrepreneur, sic-fi fan, survivor,
sister and friend. Terri followed her heart and relocated to Washington
State in 2009 and now lives out her days in a cabin in the woods,
and she thrives!


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Ask the Certifiers image

Ask the Certifiers: Clarify
Natalie Tucker Miller, MMC

Q: I’m having a debate with my triad buddies. If the coach “misses
or ignores what is most important”, as stated in Mastery #6, Clarify,
is it possible to still coach effectively? I say yes, because there is always
some truth to whatever the client brings to the session. My colleague says,
no way, you’re just going down rabbit holes if you don’t get to
the heart of the session.

I love this kind of debate! It’s not unlike some of the discussions the
certifiers might have when faced with this very issue in a scoring session.

The short answer is: you’re both right. With the risk of sounding trite
with “it depends,” it really does.

Now, first let me make it very clear that if there is not evidence of having
discovered the importance of something for the client whereby a noticeable and
transformative shift occurs, there are several factors to consider. There is
not a cut-and-dried answer to such a complex relationship as coach and client.

First, let’s use the language of the Masteries to determine some things:

Is the coach making assumptions without verifying what they heard?

Are there symptoms that are addressed without discovering what is driving the

Does the coach appear to be minimizing or avoiding a topic?

These are examples of behaviors that are not likely to be effective for gaining
clarity, and an outcome of “going down rabbit holes” is certainly
a possibility. It may well be difficult to have an overall productive session,
as we have seen in Mastery
#3 (Engaged Listening) Infographic
how the masteries work together.

Now, let’s consider a second instance. What if the coach misses something
important — not because of avoiding or solving or ignoring, but because there
is an excavation process taking place? As the coach identifies patterns of thought
or action, she gauges the reactions of the client and remains respectful to
the client’s process. There may be something the client is hinting at,
but is reluctant to fully share. Still, the effects of clarity are there. The
client feels understood, his energy is increased and there is more possibility
for further exploration.

We’ll assume that in neither of these examples the client has the proverbial
“ah-ha!” However, in the first instance, the coach’s behaviors
that show up under “Clarifying” could be indicative of similar skill
in other masteries, making it difficult to have a satisfying session. In the
second instance, there is more possibility of the client gaining clarity of
thought, or clarity of their relationship to the situation, which could result
in a fulfilling session.

please, continue to have these debates, and see if you, too, can find
evidence for both sides, citing the effects, measure, behaviors, etc.,
within the Masteries E-Book. (free
for members
, $27
for non-members

Do you have a question that you’d like to ask the certifiers?
Submit your questions here: http://certifiedcoachblog.typepad.com/blog/ask-the-certifiers.html.

Natalie Tucker Miller


Natalie Tucker Miller, MMC, is the Lead Certifier and a certifying
examiner at the IAC, as well as Past-President. Natalie is founder
of Ageless-Sages.com Publishing (www.ageless-sages.com),
and creator of the literary genre, Picture Books for Elders™.


Please send your questions on the IAC Coaching Masteries®
and the certification process to certification@certifiedcoach.org.

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IAC Mastery #1
Establishing and Maintaining a Relationship of Trust
Martha Pasternack

It is June and the wildfires are raging all around me. My family and I are
safe right now, but I wouldn’t be authentic if I told you that I was not
afraid. I am afraid and I have no control over what is happening in our high
mountain forests. I am humbled by the grandeur of nature.
I am having a little bit of a wrestling match with trusting that we will stay
safe right now.

Not only that, but my husband is days away from flying with me to Cleveland,
Ohio because he is scheduled for open-heart surgery. And, yes, that scares me
too. I am authentically afraid. I am humbled by the mystery of life.

It may come as no surprise that authenticity and trust are what I want to talk
about this month in the VOICE. Here is the background.

I made a prayer, if that is what you would call it:

“I want to attract influential, educated, professional women who are
ready to step into their personal power with beauty, dignity and grace in service
to a peaceful and kinder world. Women who have a firm grasp on their purpose.
Women who want the support of a life coach to take their next step.”

This sounded simple, clear and straightforward to me at the time. In other
words, I set an intention.

Well gang, guess what happened.

A woman hired me to be her coach. Yay!
She is educated, powerful and influential. Yay!

She is a woman immersed in corporate America. She is dynamic, assertive, driven
towards excellence. She is performance-focused and is proud to be committed
to climbing the corporate ladder. She is devoted to taking immediate assertive
action on any goal she sets.

As I began working with her, I noticed some things. Sometimes she seemed simply
and blatantly over-the-top assertive. (I try not to say aggressive, but sometimes
it felt like aggression.)

She is a woman who pushed hard against me and my personality, which appears
to be the opposite of hers. I struggled to believe that my coaching style and
her communication style were compatible.

During our initial conversation I noticed my heart picking up speed.
I caught myself dreading our next session. I considered a candid conversation
that would terminate our relationship before it got really bad. I considered
mediation, getting pregnant and suffering morning sickness all day (I am 60),
going silent, catching a cold and loosing my voice for 3 months (just kidding).

After considering all these clever and creative ways of backing out of the
relationship -which is an option in coaching-I said “Nope, I am going
for it here. I am going to surrender to this answer to my prayer.”

I landed on:
“I am going to MATCH her powerful energy with my own powerful energy.
We have two very different expressions of personal power. I am going to relax.
I am going to be vulnerable and honest with her."

And that is exactly what I did. Together we clarified her intention for coaching.
We clarified mine. We talked about our differences and designed a plan to potentiate
our differences rather than be hindered by them.

We smoked out the fears and insecurities that were holding her back from her
clarity (and there were many.) She is very hard on herself and has relentless

Today our coaching relationship is based on trust and authenticity. It is mutually
satisfying. Coaching takes place at the interface of each of us. She remains
powerful, focused and a let’s-get-this-done kind of gal. I remain firmly
planted and grounded in gentleness and my belief in her innate wisdom. She is
delightful, non-defensive and allows herself to be powerful in her vulnerability,
as do I.

Do we ever lose our connection? Of course we do. Now we know how to circle
back around and get it back.

Are we any more alike? Not even close. In fact, I think we are even less alike
since each of us stopped trying so hard to “make it work.”

Do we hold a common vision in which her goals, dreams and desires are free
to reside? Absolutely.

I look forward to our sessions now. We are like two very distinct pieces of
wood and we dovetail beautifully to create a relationship. We are powerfully
in alignment with her/our coaching intention and full of integrity with each

It is magical. She has thanked me for my wise and masterful coaching! I feel
immense gratitude for the ease in which she has integrated her humanity within
her work.

learned so much about IAC Mastery #1 with this woman, and about being
authentic and trusting of who individuals can become in a life coaching
relationship. She is free to be assertive her heart’s content.
I am now empowered to be free to coach in the midst of personal circumstances,
like fire and fear, without having to lose my footing, without losing
my voice, or getting pregnant at age 60. Yay!

Martha Pasternack
Martha Pasternack MCC (IAC) www.CircleofLifeCoach.com
My passion for witnessing the beauty and mystery of life, healthy
healing and the promotion of Peace on Earth are integral to my daily
life. I have been life coaching since 2004 as a Fearless Living Coach
after working 30 years as a health care professional.


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Group photo student coaching

How Coaching Dream Enablers Empower Student Coaching
Leanne Chan

A recent IAC HK Chapter event displayed how the IAC Coaching Dream Enablers
empower the Shatin HKIVE (Hong Kong Institute of Vocational Education) students,
who are the first IAC Coaching Students Club members in Hong Kong to have authentic
conversations among different generational groups.

The group included experienced coaches, student development officers, professional
consultants, human resources and under-graduated students. The discussion was
all about the possibilities of introducing coaching to the education field and
providing an impact on the Post-90s generation for their personal development
and enhancement.

To start with, as the facilitator of the evening, I expressed the key driver
to move along this meaningful project with HK Shatin IVE: we believe the Post-90s
are our future leaders and they have potential to create a better future. They
are the under-craft diamonds and will show their shiny edges upon their awareness
of what has driven them most. We followed this discussion with an interview
with different student coaches. Below are some of their observations and discoveries
through this student coaching journey:

  • “Before this student coaching journey, my knowledge of coaching was
    zero. Now I have the confidence to say that I understand the concept of coaching
    conversation skills at a higher level.”
  • “Coaching took her out of the internet world, into a more realistic,
    thoughtful process to sort out options and solutions.”
  • “My coach acts as a lighthouse, guides me in the right direction.
    Drives me to think deeply about what happiness I would like to get from my
  • “Coaching strengthens my self-awareness and communication skills,
    and has improved my family relationship.”
  • “My coach empowers me to think of more possibilities; I apply this
    in the workplace and to myself. I ask myself who am I and what I want and
    need. It is really an amazing journey.”
  • “I now know how to consider others’ feelings and I intend to
    apply the coaching skills to support an introverted student to take one step
    further. It turns out can express his own ideas in public.”

After the interviews, we had a sincere conversation among all the participants.
We discussed how these students will be able to apply coaching conversations
in their future workplaces. As coaching is still very new to the education field
in Hong Kong, the idea that coaching can begin with young adults raised many

  • Build up the campus coaching culture, sow the seed in early stage
  • Set up the Student Coaching Club in different undergraduate colleges
  • Start the coaching culture even earlier from secondary school

To conclude the meeting, we shared the strong belief that life impacts life;
How wonderful and meaningful it will be when our students, teachers and education
professionals play the major roles as future leader coaches, career coaches,
parent coaches, life coaches, etc. It will encourage our society to become more
inclusive, innovative, and collaborative.

student coaching group

Leanne Chan


Chan, ACC (ICF) is President of IAC HK Chapter, career & campus
coach serving both on campus and in corporations leveraging her years’
of corporate HR and talent management experience plus strong desire
to help young people become who they’re, not being under others
~ Listen with CARE, Talent Communication ~

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The International Leadership & Coaching Conference


The IAC co-sponsored the International Leadership & Coaching Conference
2013 that was held in Bangalore, India in June 2013. The Intrad School of Executive
Coaching (ISEC), founded by IAC Vice President Krishna Kumar, organized this
first of its kind event in India. The focus of the International Leadership
& Coaching Conference (ILCC) was the ‘Seven Leadership Mantras’
that drew upon powerful Coaching concepts to generate deep self awareness, identify
and utilize inner resources, support leaders in taking responsibility for meeting
their goals, and help them attain their maximum potential. Sir John Whitmore,
widely regarded as the pioneering of modern business coaching, delivered the
keynote address. Other presentations, each of them with powerful takeaways,
were delivered by Master Coaches from around the world.

The ILCC was attended by nearly 80 delegates from 10 countries, with the IAC
very well represented by Chapter Presidents from Asia, including Jin Lee Teo
(Singapore), Shanmugam Moorthi (Malaysia), Jinny Wang (Taiwan), Nigel Cumberland
(Dubai), Leanne Chan (Hong Kong), Ed Britton (China), Saurav Mohanty (India)
and many IAC members from India, Asia and the UK.


Sir John Whitmore receiving first IAC lifetime acheivement award

the occasion of the IAC’s 10th Anniversary, the IAC honored
Sir John Whitmore, an acknowledged thought leader in the world of
coaching, with the first IAC Lifetime Achievement Award. The award
was jointly presented by Krishna Kumar, IAC Vice-President, and IAC-Board
Members Jin Lee Teo and Shanmugam Moorthi.


IAC President’s Award  given to Bonnie Chan

on this occasion, the IAC President’s Award was given to Bonnie
Chan, Asia’s first Master Masteries Coach (IAC-MMC) and member
of the IAC Certifying Board. This award was presented to Bonnie by
Krishna Kumar on behalf of IAC President Dr. Susan Meyer.

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Member Chat Calls

Date: August 8th, 2013
Time: 1:00 pm Eastern Time
Hosted by Vicki Zanini
Register: here

Date: August 20th, 2013
Time: 4:00 pm Eastern Time
Hosted by Vicki Zanini
Register: here

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Masteries Practitioner

to Denise Pang from Singapore and Catherine
from Singapore who recently earned their Masteries
Practitioner Designations!


Your Feedback

We'd love to get your feedback on any issue related to the IAC. Do
you have any questions, concerns, encouragement or ideas for improvement
regarding membership benefits, certification, the VOICE, the direction
of the organization or anything else at all? Please send an email
to voice@certifiedcoach.org.
Please help us improve.

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