This column is provided by an IAC Coaching Masteries®-Licensed School or Mentor.
Meet "C.W.": The Curious Witness Who Makes It Easier for You to Coach and to Approach Challenges
by Doris Helge, MCC (IAC)
Allow me to introduce you to a part of yourself that is perfectly prepared to connect you with a deep sense of inner peace, even when you're unsure about which way to go while you're coaching or confronting a challenge.
C.W. is your “Curious Witness.” C.W. is one of the most effective and effortless tools you’ll ever discover for transforming discomfort into personal power and joy. It is an expansion of IAC Mastery #4—Processing in the Present.
C.W. already lives inside of you. Notice that you're analyzing the idea of a C.W. while you read this article. You've just proven that part of you is already playing the role of a neutral witness. This component of yourself is, and always has been, a friendly part of your core self.
When you discover how to use C.W., you develop profound trust in yourself and in the process of life. You avoid emotional roller coasters, self-judgment and judgment of your experiences.
With C.W., you become so curious about watching the movie of your life that you can’t wait to see how each scene turns out. You accept life on its own terms, so you’re filled with inner peace. You trust that your movie (your life) will continue to be interesting, so you have no desire or demand that it turn out a certain way. Since you have no attachment to a certain outcome, you witness your life in an impartial manner.
When you discover how to work with C.W. you observe yourself having unpleasant feelings or experiences. You don’t avoid or deny your emotions because what we resist persists. However, your emotions don’t become a primary identity. You acknowledge negative emotions and experience them as sensations in your body. You still gain the benefits of emotions, including new insights, but you're very clear that you are not the anger, fear or sadness that you observe yourself experiencing.
Because C.W. is a neutral, factual observer detached from emotional angst, negative feelings flow through very quickly. There's no resistance. You easily detect misperceptions so they gently fade away. When you work with C.W., you're blessed with an impartial umpire 24/7.
This means that you effortlessly avoid the temptation to judge your experiences as bad, unfortunate or unnecessary. Fears of the unknown are overwhelmed by excitement concerning your next steps. Your energy is fully available to you. With the curiosity and enthusiasm of a toddler exploring a colorful new playground, you ask yourself, “I wonder what’s next?”
C.W. also calms your inner critic because you simply observe mental chatter. Instead of believing in—empowering—your critic’s negative messages, the deeper, all-knowing part of you takes over.
A wonderful and spontaneous transition occurs when C.W. consistently serves as your personal assistant. One day, you notice that you have substituted curiosity and the joy of learning for expectations that cause pain when they don’t come to fruition.
Because C.W. helps you experience life in the moment, you link with one of your best resources—your intuition. You steadily prove to yourself that you always have dependable inner guidance when you're coaching. Since happiness is a side effect of living fully in each moment and following your internal clues, you notice yourself smiling more often.
This one simple technique—employing a personal witness—can help you let go of struggle and judgment and enjoy peace of mind as a new familiar zone. Start now to connect with the deep state of inner peace that is always available to you. Your clients will also gain clarity faster and easier when you use this expansion of IAC Mastery #4.
Doris Helge, Ph.D., MCC (IAC) is the founder of the IAC-licensed training school, Confident Coach Connection. She also created the New Coach Virtual Chapter of IAC and will be presenting an IAC webinar in May 2012. Download free chapters from Doris' Amazon.com #1 bestselling books at http://FreeJoyEbooks.com.
To register for the IAC webinar, please visit:
https://www4.gotomeeting.com/register/171140519
